I blog because for me its therapeutic. I choose to share these blogs with those who want to follow along. Trust me, you don't see every blog I type for many reason. One, it's too personal, two, some people would take it the wrong way and three, it's my blog!
Social situations are becoming increasingly harder for me. In small groups I'm still pretty chatty. But in larger groups among people I don't know, it's not easy. In fact I probably come off as a jerk. But when faced with a conversation with a stranger it doesn't usually go over well because I usually can't clearly be understood. Often, I try to talk softer or as my Speech Therapist calls it my "confidential voice". I am pretty used to people saying "What?", "excuse me?", "I'm sorry, I didn't hear you?". It only gets frustrating when I have tried to repeat myself four times. I actually used to talk quite loud, but the sounding like a 13 year old going through puberty isn't very cool to me. People, who only have seen me sitting down and having not spoken to me yet, would naturally think I am fine. If a person does choose to talk to me I feel almost compelled to explain why I might be talking like I am 9 beers deep. But I haven't found an easy/short way to let people know. Sometimes I just want to try the "I'm Deaf" act and point to my ear and pretend I can't hear you. That seem disrespectful so sometimes I just revert to good ole body language, while I can. A nod or a shake of the head or a thumbs up or down goes a long way. The worst is when people think I am joking, but this is really the way I sound, I don't always sound bad which might make people think I am kidding around because the last time I spoke sounded pretty normal. I got a pretty thick skin so I can usually handle it, just be prepared for a real sassy response and you might be inserting your foot into your mouth. If I am in a situation where my heart rate is definitely up; you probably said something that pissed me off or you put me on the spot (poker players will understand) I will almost never say anything and just give you the shrug. I actually hate that the worst because comebacks were definitely something I was good at.
Peace!
Darrin
Comments
Post a Comment