What I think I can do is not the same as what I can actually do. Recalling what I used to be able to do physically is something we all deal with as we age. Not being able to do the things I loved, that I normally should be able to do, stings. Although not as bad as it used. That's just the hand I was dealt. I still work as much as I can with obvious limitations. I am pretty lucky that way that I have a job that I can do. Many people still look to me for geeky help. I'm a bit slower at it and can't be in the trenches like I used to . I miss out on a lot of decision making, implementing new things but I still do a small share of it just not on the scale I know I can/wish i can contribute. My eyes are way bigger than my stomach these days. I can do that, I can handle that. No problem? There was a time I could juggle 5 things at once. Now, I get that third thing done and I'm done. I can push my way through though it all, right? I do. But I pay for it dearly usually the next day. Will I do it again? Most likely. If my body could actually talk to me I'm fairly confident it would have many descriptive words it would say to me. Right now work kinda keeps me going and gives me that sense of purpose so I'll do it for as long as my body will take it. That's not going to be as long as I want, I'm sure.
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